Immortality...

I suppose that I would care to live in this flesh forever, but I don't see it in the cards.

If I were able to live forever, it would be a matter of time before I had visited every square inch of this planet and tasted all of the cuisines that were ever concocted and seen all of the plays and dances that the mortals could have ever invented... Then things would become very dull.

I used to wish for a boring existence, when I was sure that I'd had enough excitement to last me three lifetimes, but now that I have had it... I wish that excitement would return to me.
I have become tired by guessing the outcome of every moment and knowing the end of the story by the third page.

I am learning that life takes on certain patterns because that is how life is meant to be. We can resist the natural order of things and opt for a tiresome existence of being a constant outsider to everything that makes us part of the species, or we can do like everybody else and eat the bitter fruit so that the taste of the sweet is multiplied by our lack of it.

I suspect that I have shut myself off from the fullness that my life could be for too long so that I could avoid making errors that others would view as foolishness. Trying to not be a fool is like trying not to breath... You can hold your breath for so long, and the you are forced to take a bigger gulp of air.


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